My Wondering Mind

I'm sitting here this morning drinking my coffee with some random thoughts. Thoughts that I really don't need to give brain space to.

I've been sleeping awful this week. That never helps anything. In fact I'm not even sure if it's really safe to be blogging right now because you just never really know what may come out. Surprised smile

Here's how it goes- I go to sleep- I have some bizarre dream- I wake- look at my phone for a missed call (yes at 2am) and then attempt to go back to sleep. Some nights I do this 4 or 5 times. The missed call you think? Who could possibly call in the middle of the night?

Well these calls tend to be the tragic ones, ones with bad news, accidents etc....
Now granted this could happen. To ANYONE: What makes me entertain those thoughts... trust and truth - both of which I lack in when my mind is wondering.

I have been walked, pulled from, crawled out of, prayed through so much and yet daily I struggle with placing those I love (where they are anyway) in the loving arms of God. God has shown me over and over again His faithfulness and yet my unfaith creeps up so quickly sometimes I am taken off guard by it.

So trust: I read the story of Abraham this morning- only with a divided heart. How could God really ask that of Abraham? He asked him to sacrifice his only son... as I read and wondered how hard that must have been for Abraham and truthfully doubted my own obedience if handed that same scenario.... could you?

Just being honest and yet...

God himself knows more about sacrifice than we will ever know. His son died because of things like my doubt. Ouch. How do I doubt that?

He proved His trustworthyness on that cross. He didn't have to but that act of love should leave no doubts in my mind. There's many things that God does not need to show and yet he does..... daily. He loves me, he loves those around me and will not lead me or them anywhere that he won't be. That is where truth comes in.

Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Phil 4:8
really does make sense if you ask me.

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