Thinking Out Loud

 

I have much to write about but don’t know what to write. Make sense? This week has been one of those weeks where I’ve found myself feeling so overwhelmed both good and bad. AKA thinking to much.

I’ve found myself really thinking about the different areas of my life, I’m a homemaker, a wife, a mother, now a co-worker, a daughter (as I’m lucky enough to talk to my mom almost daily) I’m even getting pretty good at getting to know Missy, You know for so long not only was I not interested in who I was, always searching for myself in the eyes of others but I must admit I was afraid of what I’d find. I mean there are some down right ugly things that happened in my life either as a matter of choice and sometimes just life circumstance. I blame no one or myself for those things. What’s done is done and Jesus handled that for me.

I was driving home the other night and I was thinking about the sermon that I heard in church that morning. Our Pastor started a series on Studying the Bible.This can get confusing if you’ve grown up not so well grounded or found yourself in a situation where believing the truth reveals some hard truths about yourself.. So I was driving and thinking about the many differences there are in today’s world, how so many things have been taken out of context and used and abused to satisfy special interests or keep sin at bay just a little longer. We all do this in one way or another.

I thought about my own salvation and this is the thought that went through my head "what would my life be like today had I never come into a walk with my Savior Jesus" What if I had missed that turn? For so long I thought there is some self help something out there. That is not what the bible tells us. No not at all, in fact it is very clear that things of self, human desires are sinful desires that no matter what we do we are not good enough. We are saved through grace" .

What I heard that stirred that thought was this.

"What Jesus did for us was free, is that what makes it so easy to devalue His sacrifice?

So what that means is this- If salvation cost us anything would we be more willing to protect it and defend truth, no matter the cost in our own life. I’m still thinking on this.

In the Beth Moore book I’m reading right now she was saying how when God reveals truth to her how she wants to send out the worlds biggest email. Boy can I relate to that! Was my salvation free? Yes of course it was. But daily I think about the ways I did pay the world for not trusting and not relying on God. Again I wonder-What if I had missed that turn? And what about those that haven’t made that turn. There are still many sitting content on the fence.... Yes I want to go to heaven but I’m a good person, A loving God wouldn’t send me to hell. Are you sure about that? A little less dramatic way of thinking for fence sitters- God will be there when I need him right? 

What does this have to do with my different roles. No matter which role I’m in I have one primary purpose and that is to honor to my Heavenly Father. Someday when all is said and done what I’ve done here will matter little. What I’ve done for Him here will matter greatly. Do you ever think about what will be said about you when your gone from this earth? (I know it’s morbid.) This summer a gal that I knew through a mutual friend passed away from after a 6 month battle with cancer. She was 30 years old and the mother of two young children. 3 years old and 6 months. I’m don’t know a lot about her but I do know she chose to trust Christ and in the end that is what matters.

I don’t want to hear Missy had a good heart, Missy was a good mom, or a great wife. I want others to say "That Missy, she sure loved Jesus." That’s what I want. That would bless me more than you know. PS: The other stuff would be good to hear too Winking smile )

Good Night Angel

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